Friday, 23 May 2014

How well do you know your child?



…Loral School drags parents back to classroom to teach them how to relate properly with their children
Spokesperson of Counselling Association of Nigeria (CASSON), Dr Celine Njoku, has stressed the need for parental education to reduce the increasing rate of abuses suffered by school children across the country. She said many children live in utter frustration, bogged down by sad experiences of domestic violence, sexual harassment and corrupt peer influence. Njoku made the appeal during this year’s Parent/Student Rendezvous organized by the management of Loral International Day Secondary School (LIDSS) to foster intimacy in relationship between parents of the school and their children. The programme, which focused on the theme, How Well do I Know My Child, was attended by several parents, mostly mothers, who had a rich buffet with their children to strengthen the bond of relationship between them.
The Principal of the school, Elder Ben Uzoukwu, said the get-together was an innovation geared towards educating parents more on the various activities involving their children in the school. He said the step became necessary to pull down the walls of silence and fear existing between some parents and their children.
“Some parents find it difficult to relate properly with their children. Some parents do not attend the open-day programmes at school. It is unfortunate that some do not even know the last result of their children. The essence of this programme is to facilitate the understanding between parents and their child and also bridge the communication gap between them,” he said.
Uzoukwu’s claim that most parents have little knowledge of their children was put to the test at the event, where parents were asked questions on the personal life of their children, questions like: ‘What is your child’s best subject?’ ‘Who is your child’s best friend?’ ‘What was your child’s grade in the last examination?’ Which subject was your child’s worst performance last term?’ ‘What is your child’s preferred course of study?’
The result of this exercise was an eye-opener to the participants, as most parents failed the questions on their child’s last grade at school, his best friend at school, his best subject and his future career.
Uzoukwu expressed optimism that the programme would help in pulling down the walls of silence between some parents and their children and foster mutual interaction for the mental development of children.
Speaking further, Dr Njoku recounted an incident where a man took his children to the embassy for a visa but failed to state the date of birth of the children when demanded by the officials. He was sent away in humiliation, she recalled. Njoku lamented that most mothers have left their roles in the family to house-helps. She recounted with sadness how a 15-year-old SS 3 student of one school in Satellite Town Lagos confessed to being a sex hawker, often getting home at 11.30pm.
“Anytime I come in contact with these children, if I tell them, let’s tell your dad or mum, they will say ‘No’. It is unfortunate that children are losing confidence in their parents,” she said.
Njoku recounted another pathetic story of a 16-year-old girl who was sexually abused several times by her randy dad, while her mother snored peacefully in her room. The victim, according to Njoku, put a distress call to her, one night, that her dad was pressurizing her for sex, which prompted her to call the sleeping mum to check on her daughter in her room.
She advised parents to become the best friends of their children and spend quality time with them. According to her, getting intimate with the children would enable the parents to find out the children’s secrets, worries and bags of tricks.
“Most of these children live like orphans in their own homes. They are like abandoned children living in a secluded world of pains and fears. They find happiness often in the presence of their friends outside,” she lamented.
While commending the school for the interactive programme, Miss Uma Miracle, a JSS 2 student and Eniola Orireyemi (SS3) stressed the need for good parental care to guarantee a better future for children. Both agreed that parents that over-pamper their children stand the risk of ruining the lives of those young ones.

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